What determines the individual's self-esteem. Why one person can say that he is stupid, and he didn't even pay attention to it, shake off, as the dust from your shoes and go on.
And, for another, it would be so painful to hear that he will be offended, will close and even revenge to whoever about it is said.
What determines what we perceive.
Praise can become a powerful incentive for action.
To be the controller in the direction of movement of the individual, which specifies the individual route. What is praised is good, this is what we need to do. What abuse is bad, it is what not to do.
But is it really self-esteem of a person depends on external praise or censure. Rather, the praise or blame can affect the self-esteem, but it is unlikely to be its basis.
The person may feel humiliated from constant censure, or will rise in the esteem when it glorify, but it looks more like a balloon that is easy to inflate, but that is easily blown away.
And if a person susceptible to the opinions of others, then of course it becomes easy to manage.
By this method we educate those around us: our children, our Pets.
Even our husbands or wives, can also be the object of our educational lecture about what not to do and what they have done well.
And yet, it can be colleagues at work, neighbors, friends, and just random people with whom I met, for example, in public transport.
And here, for example, a passerby stepped on your foot, it hurts, and you told him about what he is and that he do not any more.
And how is self-esteem such a man will suffer from your opinions. Most likely, if it's an adult with a stable psyche, it is unlikely. He has developed strong defense mechanisms, it can be even not pay attention to your statements or pay, but politely apologize and go on.
But if it's a child or teenager whose sensitivity to the world around us more vulnerable, and the consequences of such statements can permanently imprinted in the consciousness of the individual.
Because their perception is only being formed and has no clear boundaries about what is good and what is not. And it makes their mind more receptive, but the situation is not very stable. Respectively, and to cut the ground from under the feet, such a person is much easier than someone who stands firmly on his feet.